Flash Fiction: The Bedside Portal

Ever been skydiving? I haven’t.  A friend of mine did and he said it was an amazing experience once you level out and descend like you see in the movies but, that the first few seconds are terrifying and nauseating.  As soon as you leave the plane, you tumble uncontrollably through the sky.  Head over heel, heels over head, plummeting, rotating and trying to scream and not be sick at the same time.  At some point you plateau, and the fun experience begins.

For me, the fun didn’t begin.  I did, sort of level out a couple of times but couldn’t maintain it.  But then I didn’t have an instructor strapped to my back.  Nor was I skydiving.  I’d fallen out of bed.

It was Friday 26^th June 2020 (I have a thing for dates now).  The UK had been in lockdown during the Covid pandemic for several weeks.  I’d been furloughed so had basically spent all of my team in my bedsit watching tv and reading.  In a weird way, I hadn’t been too bothered about doing that but then, I am a bit of a couch potato.  At least, I was.

I was laid in bed, on top of the covers, sleeping soundly, when I heard my phone ping.  The clock by my bed read “03:13”.  My phone wasn’t next to my clock.  I’d left it in my jeans pocket, hanging on the back of a chair against the wall.  I leaned out of the bed and stretched for it.  I couldn’t quite reach and, instead of getting off the bed and walking the two paces, I leaned out further and stretched very sinew to get my fingertips to my phone.  That was when I fell.

The tumbling and screaming followed.  It felt like it lasted a long time but, perhaps was only a few seconds as I can’t recall taking a second breath to renew my scream.  After which I splashed down.  Literally, I landed in shallow water.  I swallowed some of it with my gasps and came to find myself on all fours, water lapping around my knees and wrists, wheezing and coughing out foul tasting water.  Then I heard the laughing and looked up.

I was in a fountain.  It’s a long, contemporary looking piece in Nottingham’s Market Square.  The laughter was from a few bystanders, laughing from behind their face masks, who must have turned to look having heard the splash.  I felt my colour flush in embarrassment and I quickly tried to find my footing and get out of the murky water.

It was a bright, hot and sunny day and I began to dry out almost immediately and even didn’t look much out of place having been wearing my pyjamas: A Snoopy shorts and t-shirt set.  To say I was bewildered is about as close as I can come to describing how I felt.  I staggered a bit, still dizzy from my fall and I was dry heaving too.  A delivery driver, lugging a box, walked briskly past me muttering under his breath and beneath his mask “piss head”.

As soon as I felt more level-headed and normal, I walked home.  It was as I walked that I passed a newspaper kiosk.  I don’t know what made me look but, I did.  The newspapers weren’t today’s.  Although, they actually were today’s, they weren’t “my” today’s.  They were dated Wednesday 17^th June 2020.  The person running the kiosk chided me for not wearing a mask and not buying the paper I was clutching tightly.

Looking back on it now, I chuckle to myself that I was disappointed that my first foray int time travel hadn’t yielded more spectacular results.  Would I have been happier finding myself aboard that Titanic on 15^th April 1912 or in Dallas on 22^nd November 1963?  Now, I’m thankful it was a meek discovery and a trip back in time of just a few days.  It helped prepare me for what was to come.

Author’s Note: This story came about from two things.  One, was my friend telling me about the parachute jump that he did and how much you just tumble around to begin with before levelling out.  The other, was me, imagining a mundane time travel experience.  I recall watching The Time Tunnel when I was younger and even a few reruns on the Horror Channel and they always ended up landing in a significant historical moment (the mention of the Titanic is a nod to The Time Tunnel’s first episode).  So, in my mind, I wondered how it would be if someone accidentally fell into a portal that transported them through time…to last Wednesday.  There is potential for more though, which is why I left it open for further adventures.  Who knows, the narrator may even travel to the future…like maybe next Thursday?!

Peru Travel Blog: 7th October 2011: Homeward Bound

Today is my last day in Peru.  As usual I woke up early, but this time I returned to bed after having some breakfast.

I don’t get picked up to go to the airport until 1630 and while I could have used that time to have a full day tour of the city I have instead opted to lounge around watching TV and then exploring the immediate vicinity of the hotel for a few hours.  There is a shopping mall that I am going to take a walk to that looks pretty good.

All over the news is the upcoming World Cup Qualifying football match between Peru and Paraguay.  Remember when the FA cup coverage would start in the morning and run all day?  It’s like that, but it starts even earlier – I woke up at 0530 and they already had reporters outside the ground.  I think it would almost be nice if I stayed an extra night to watch it!  [Incidentally, Peru won 3-0.]

After a lazy morning of watching TV and packing my bag I headed out onto the vibrant city streets of Lima to make my way to the Lacormar shopping mall which is right by the coast.  I’m not sure where the time went – it took me barely 15 minutes to reach the mall and there were hardly so many shops that I would have thought I would have spent so long looking round them, but evidently I did.  I had a coffee when I got there and did a bit of people watching.  Then wandered round the shops.  I was tempted to get another football shirt, but having already picked up a Cienciano (Cusco) Football Club shirt, it didn’t feel right buying a shirt of their rivals.  But, it did make me decide to get a Peru national football shirt when I find one (the airport shops).

I bought a book that originally I thought I would read on the way home.  Death In the Andes by Mario Vargas Llosa; written by a Peruvian and set in Peru it sounded like it would be a good read.  I was going to get the Lost City of the Inca’s by Hiram Bingham (the guy who rediscovered Machu Picchu), but I wasn’t sure I would enjoy it as much as a novel and it seemed quite expensive.  I watched surfers trying to get a decent wave whilst I had some lunch at one of the restaurants with great views of the coast and also had one eye on the live Uruguay V Bolivia football match.  Before I knew it, it was time for me to head back to the hotel.  It was a nice relaxing day.

It took ages to get to the airport.  I’m starting to think that Lima traffic is always bad, but once there it was a very quick walk to check in and through to the departure lounge where I had plenty of time to kill.  I bought myself a Peru football shirt, a few gifts and some Pisco and Pisco sour mix to share with guests.  Feel really happy to be going home, but can’t even think where to begin describing it to people.

It was planes, trains and automobiles once again as I got my flight back to the UK, a train to Nottingham and my girlfriend picking me up from the station in her car.

I did get stopped at customs and my bag x-rayed.  I guess coming into the UK from Peru via Amsterdam may look a little suspicious!  But that didn’t really slow me down.

I had a great time: a once in a lifetime experience, but I was so glad to be home with my girlfriend and the cats.  I finally got my long soak in a hot bath too.

I hope anyone reading this blog has enjoyed it as much as I have enjoyed experiencing it and writing about it.  Who knows where my travel plans will take me next…?